Time in the Key of Ashley

Happy Saturday.

It’s a little after noon and I’m out and about treating myself to some much desired Shake Shack. Then it’s on to get some new glasses.

As I was sitting here strolling through social media , I paused and asked myself : What are you expecting from today ? I’m expecting nothing from my self but to have peace.

Ive been neglecting myself for work and other people. I’ve already went on a tangent about stretching myself thin, so I’ll spare you that song and dance. I’m 

I encourage you as I encourage me, stop and listen to yourself.   

 

Happy Saturday  

BiancaComment
Heart to Heart

Ive been struggling these past few weeks with choosing God. After building all this momentum with my Tuesday’s, I let the train stop.  

I stopped putting in an effort to see and hear. This journey is not simply for me to preach the Gospel but also for me to grow.  I find myself going through different waves of strength. This week I’m climbing upwards. 

As I’m restarting my engine, I hear the words “Stop looking for God in the place you left Him”. Since Easter, I’ve been tasked with discovering all the things I didn’t know about Jesus. All the accounts I skimmed but never paid attention to. The small details have suddenly sprung to life off the page. I have to ask myself have I really known Him? Have I become comfortable in who I thought he was versus who He can be ?

For me it’s been like thinking you’ve  known a person for years, only to discover that they have an entire personality that you never knew.  As a matter of fact, a whole life that doesn’t involve you as you are now. Yet this person is so amazing and brilliant that you’re trying to figure out how you can make room for yourself at their table. How can you be involved in these things? 

When you love someone you dive into their interest , you want to see what they see. Protect them from harm. Spend time with them. Be a better person for them.

I’m trying to figure out who I am right now. What means the most to me and how everything else fits in. Hell even if it fits at all. I’m redefining who I want to be.

Whew Chile, I’m evolving and exhausted. 

Prayers Welcomed. 

 

BiancaComment
What About Your Friends?

Lately I’ve realized that I’ve been critical of the people I surround myself with. I’m always preaching about what a good friend is...but is that who I am?

Tonight I took a long look in the mirror and I didn’t like who I saw.

Honestly, I’m rude af. I’m curious as to why people even want to be my friend. Those that truly know me, know I can be moody and mean. I’ll remind you of that 1 thing you did 10 years ago every 5 minutes.  I’ll support your dreams. I’ll tell you to get out my face. I’ll interrupt your story to tell my own. I won’t let you tell me about myself. You can be pissed at me and I’ll still be all up in your business cause I don’t care. I never call. I’m terrible at texting back. If you need me, I’ll drop it all (sometimes) and pray with you. I’ll cuss you out for being inconsiderate. I’ll preach to you at 3am. When you need me I’m there. 

In this new year, I realized that I’m still carrying myself like people don’t have a heart for me.  Like I’m not loved or my thoughts don’t matter. People are depending on me and I’m failing them. 

I prayed that this year I would be open to have more covenants with people instead of relationships. I would be surrounded with people who would fight for me as much as I did for them. Arguments and disagreements don’t mean the end of who we are. Friends aren’t people that come and go. Those are acquaintances. Friends grow with you. They water you when you wilt. They stand in the sun with you. You in return stand with them. Call them out on their bs. Friends are people who make an agreement to walk with you. They accept the sorry you’re too stubborn to say. They teach you how to be bendable. Most importantly they teach you how to love someone other than yourself.

What kind of friend have you been? 

What kind of friend do you want to be ?  

 

 

BiancaComment
Another Tuesday

It’s Another Tuesday of Devotion. Another day of Grace and Mercy. Everything doesn’t have to be so deep that no one understands you. Sometimes life is shallow. Let’s let today remain at surface level. It is what it is. 

Take a few minutes and just sit in who you are in this moment and allow yourself to feel. Spend time with yourself.

 

BiancaComment
Pause

Last week I skipped my usual Tuesday devotional to get myself right. I was in between decompressing from having company and mourning the loss of Nipsey Hussle ( I’ll go into details my feelings about that on another day).

Last week was tough, but I made it.  I’ve been doing the thing where I stretch myself thin and wide. I have to remember I’m not elastic. Despite what I’ve been told, I cannot do it all, all the time. It’s tiring.  While scrolling through Instagram this morning I saw something so beautiful that caused me to take a moment. In this week of being in my feelings I’ve been neglecting my me- time , God time, friend time, alladat.

God has a way of throwing things in our face when he wants to get our attention. I’d been seeing a few straightforward messages about sitting in worship and taking a moment to yourself.  Most of us do like I did this past week...ignored it. However this one post stopped me in my tracks. It reminded me about God’s faithfulness and most importantly his grace. Despite our pains and inflictions, he’s there. It’s like running into an old friend you haven’t seen in months, but when you reconnect it’s like there was never a disconnect. 

I realized there’s a way out of this feeling. My spirit has felt so overwhelmed. I’m over here trying to deal with it all the pressure on my own.  I’m reminded of this word:

“Come to Me, all of you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. All of you, take up My yoke and learn from Me, because I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for yourselves.”

Matthew‬ ‭11:28-29

In conclusion: Find rest. Stop and Choose God for if even just 5 minutes of the day. Let that thing that you’re stressing over go. It’s not worth it.

Also get into Pain & Grace (the song that stopped me in tracks this morning)

 

BiancaComment
Check-In

It’s Tuesday. 

This Tuesday is going to be a little different than the previous ones. No deep word search or meditation questions I’m just taking time to reflect on 27 while listening to Aretha and finding strength within myself.

Physically, I’m tired.

Emotionally and Mentally I’m “meh”.  

As important as it is to check in with God, it’s also important to check in with you. 

How’s your week?

Have you been doing things you both NEED and WANT? 

Are you processing your emotions? 

Are you becoming who you want to be?  

Are you reaching your goals?

 

On Friday, I turn 28. I’ve felt a pressure to have x,y, and z done by 30...really 29. So many things have slowly been coming into fruition and I’ve been scheming.  It’s exciting and overwhelming all at once.

I realized that I’ve never mapped out a plan for this year. Generally I look at things in the scope of 5-10 year goals. However this year I’m doing one small-ish goal a month. By small-ish they’re HUGE. A giant step outside of my comfort zone. If I fail, I fail, if I don’t, I don’t. I can’t say I didn’t give it a try. I have so many projects that’s are completed but they’re sitting on a shelf waiting to be released. This blog is one of those things that’s been revamped and shut down several times. I’m just going to go with the flow and trust the process. Every single thought , dream, vision is going to happen.

Trust the process and take care of you today.

 

 

BiancaComment
Another Tuesday

Blessings! It’s that time again! 

Another Tuesday with Jesus.  

Whew Chile. This Tuesday has taken me on a roller coaster and it’s only 2pm. God has never been more real than he has in this moment. I feel a great shift. Anyways that’s a story for another day. I started that journey today in the Book of Isaiah. Like Psalms , Isaiah is one of the books that I’ve never read in its I’m entirety. I can quote you a few scriptures, but i can’t give you a full run down of what God told Isaiah. My focus over the next month is diving deep.


My original message from today (written yesterday btw) was: There’s so much to learn from the life of the prophet and prophecies. I’m reminded of the relationship between Elijah and Elisha. Mentors are meant to do two things: teach you what to do and what not to do.

As I dive into this book I’m wondering:

  • Who has been influencing your life and is it for the better?
  • What kind of word have they spoken over your life?
  • Do you love them enough to head criticism and correction or does it fall on deaf ears?


What I Actually Gleaned on Today 🔥:

“I will repay you for the years that the swarming locust ate, the young locust, the destroying locust, and the devouring locust — My great army that I sent against you.”‭‭ Joel‬ ‭2:25‬ ‭HCSB‬‬

This word had come to me 3 times before 8:45am.  Once in a podcast, meditation, and a periscope. God has not forgotten you. God does not care about the shame you’re carrying around on your back. Be courageous and trade that yoke with Him. Your shame has already been covered. Why are you still holding onto it. You wouldn’t pay a store twice for the one tube of deodorant, why are you paying for a sin that’s been covered? FOR FREE at that! You maybe be skeptical but what do you have to lose? You’ve given people your all by not God? Why? He’s not a man that shall lie. He is a mighty, gracious , redeeming God. He has plans for you. Greater than your mind could imagine if you let go of what “they” may think or say about you.

Side Take Away: I had a plan of reflection and the Holy Spirit wrecked it...wrecked me. I’m perfectly fine with that. Don’t get so caught up in your plans that you miss God giving you directions. He’s always there knowing what your heart needs. Also knowing who needs to hear from your heart. Everything ain’t about you. 

BiancaComment